10 Awesome Tips To Discipline Kids Without Yelling
If you’re like me, you’ve probably had days when your patience has been tested by the little people in your life. You’ve probably had moments when you just wanted to yell at them and tell them to stop being so difficult. But that doesn’t work, right? In fact, it usually makes things worse. So how do we discipline kids without yelling?
Despite how challenging it may seem, it is rather easy and will make everyone happier in the long run. You will be amazed at the difference this can make for both of you! The best part is that these techniques don’t need any more time or money on your end – they’re all about changing the way we think about parenting and disciplining our children. And if one technique doesn’t work for us, try another until something sticks! These methods might not seem natural at first, but they do help us get through those challenging moments with our children more easily and peacefully than before.
We hope this article helps give parents some new tools for their toolbox to find peace again during those trying times with their children.
Why Do Parents Yell?
Persistent yelling has been shown to have a lasting effect on children, especially those with less stable home lives. In one study conducted by the Journal of Marriage and Family in 2003, close to 90% of parents admitted they yelled at their kids within the last year. What’s more? For families whose oldest child is 7 or older, they admit that sometimes when they are frustrated, they yell.
Parents who try to justify their discipline methods by shouting at kids might be doing more harm than good. The following tips will help you stop yelling at your kids (and feel better in the process).
Understanding Your Triggers
Yelling doesn’t happen all the time, which means there are specific situations where it’s going to be hard not to raise your voice. For some people, this might mean an emergency situation where you feel like you’re being ignored and need immediate attention.
Suppose you can discover what causes those yelling triggers. In the event that you’re not able to avoid tantrums, it will be crucial to take a deep breath and speak in an authoritative voice.
Give Them A Warning
It’s fair to give warning to children that they are about to get into trouble. Telling them why they’re getting in trouble in advance will help you avoid becoming angry or raising your voice as a parent.
This might mean telling your kids that if they don’t put the toys away, you will have to take their toys and put them away for them. It’s an effective way of doing things because it allows a child who is so focused on playing with their toys but refuses to clean up after themselves to know exactly what will happen if they don’t listen when asked.
Giving children a warning about upcoming events can prepare them mentally, leaving them less likely to experience emotional stress or anxiety over the situation.
These methods can be used in various situations that might ensue when kids don’t listen or follow through with what they’re asked. This could involve making their bed every morning, putting away toys before dinner, doing homework before watching television, or many other things. Instead of forcefully getting what you want right-this-moment from your child by yelling at him or asking again in a different way (for example: “Did you take out the trash?” “Why haven’t you taken out the trash yet?!”), it helps parents to give children time to respond accordingly while also letting children know why they are about to get into trouble.
The Time Out Method
Child development expert Judy Arnall recommends taking a breather and heading to the bathroom as one of her favorite ways to calm down. This helps to prevent parents from reacting insensitively out of anger or frustration.
Taking a break when feeling overloaded helps with developing self-control skills.
As parents, we sometimes find ourselves in situations where we need to take some time for ourselves – whether it’s using a stress ball like the one above or taking five minutes away from our little ones. This can help us maintain control of emotions and reactions.
Creating a List
Creating a list that your whole family can participate in will keep everyone up to date on what the expectations are for each person. A list that can help make their day run more effectively.
Once again, this helps keep everyone on track and away from conflict in which misunderstandings may occur.
Understanding Whats A Normal Behaviour
Understanding your children’s normal behavior, such as not cleaning up after they play or not eating correctly, is normal for children. Parents can better handle this situation if they know what is normal behavior and what isn’t. It may be time to talk to your child about tidying up after themself or washing their hands before dinner. Instead of snapping at them immediately when they forget to do it the first time, they are reminded.
Understanding your kid’s normal behavior helps put everything into perspective. It helps take the stress out of parenting, knowing that your child is just like everyone else and will do things outside the norms at times.
Be a proactive parent.
Planning ahead can help reduce early morning arguments with your children, such as packing lunches and snacks for long drives to take some of the pressure off you as a parent.
Establish Consequences Ahead of Time
Explaining the negative consequences of breaking the rules to your child ahead of time. Such as time-outs, the takeaway of toys and gad, and other things. This way, an issue doesn’t arise on the spot your child naturally wants to whine or cry but has learned that there will be a consequence for that behavior ahead of time.
Respond Calmly and Firm
When a teacher responds to an upsetting situation with their students, they do not scream or slam. They focus on remaining calm and talking through the event calmly but firmly for effective communication.
Remember these steps to responding calmly but firmly:
- Get to eye level
- Remain calm (they’re more likely to listen or try whispering, so they must listen to hear what you have to say)
- Empathize with their feelings
- Be firm with limits and boundaries.
Using Positive Reinforcement
Using positive reinforcement helps motivate your child to follow the rules and behave the way you want. Use positive reinforcement when your child does something correctly, such as cleaning up their toys or remembering to brush their teeth before bed. Encouragement also works great!
Don’t Forget To Apologise
Saying sorry to your children after yelling at them is a great way to show them that you are genuinely sorry for your actions. Children need these apologies to show them that they can trust their parents and know what they have done wrong. Remember, there is nothing more important than ensuring your child knows who you are as a person so that when times get tough, they know where to go.
Explain why you started yelling because children will often feel ashamed, even if it isn’t their fault.
Remember to keep a positive mindset around your children, hug them, and tell them you love them after yelling at them. This can help prevent future arguments with your child. It’s also important to let your kids know that it’s okay for them to make mistakes because everyone makes mistakes.
Takeaways
We hope this article gave you some good parenting advice. It may be tough to know how to discipline your children without yelling or spanking them as a parent. Even with the best intentions and methods in disciplining kids, things can go wrong. When they do happen, remember that time-outs are one of the many tools you have to discipline children while also teaching them better decision-making skills. Leave us a comment below about how do you discipline your child without resorting to yelling.”
Charlee
I'm a Mom of two daughters, Freya and Ava. I love to share insights on how parents can be better parents. I write about topics that are relevant to me as a parent: things like parenting style, relationship, marriage, and balancing work and family.
